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What to do when you feel like a failure

Updated: Feb 10, 2022

So something goes wrong, maybe you have made a mistake, said something you regret or forgotten something important. Or perhaps you didn’t do as well as you felt you should have done.

That feeling you get as a result of feeling you have failed can be crushing.

Your heart sinks, and all kinds of emotions come up, including guilt, shame, disappointment at yourself, and helplessness at not being able to make it better. Let alone those feelings you may have let someone else down.

I can assure you, I get those feelings too.

The danger is that when it happens we can go down that rabbit hole of labelling ourselves as a failure in all areas of our lives.

Not content with feeling bad enough that we made a mistake, we then pile on memories of other incidents of when we made a mistake. Our memories come flooding back from years ago. Even to the time when we were at school and failed a test!

Why do we do that to ourselves? It only makes us feel even worse, and further confirms to us that we really must be a failure. Useless, stupid and any other negative name we can conjure up.


Can you see how this can spiral? And before you know it, you have lost confidence and motivation. Ruminating over these situations really doesn’t help.

We are all human and we all make mistakes. Falling down into that dark hole of misery isn’t going to do any good, apart from making you feel really low.


Just because you fail doesn’t mean you’re a failure - (Please read that again)

A more helpful way of looking at things is –

• Because you ‘failed’ in one thing doesn’t mean you are a failure in all areas of your life.

• See it as a temporary setback, not a catastrophe

• See it as a learning opportunity, what could you do next time, if faced with the same situation

• Remind yourself of past – and present successes

• You recovered from it!

• You’ve overcome something that felt tough, or difficult, and you can do that again.


The Love~Listen~Talk~Repeat Podcast with Wendy Capewell

#117 What Can We Expect from Chinese New Year Horoscope - Year of the Tiger 2022 - with Jillian Rothchild Scholar

Jillian Rothchild-Scholar is a classically trained Feng Shui expert, and my foundational training is in the ancient wisdom of the over-400-year-old Wu Chang Feng Shui Mastery lineage.

In this podcast, Jillian talks about the Chinese New Year horoscope and Year of the Tiger 2022.

As well as explaining when the Year of the Water Tiger begins. She explains how by using different calendars the date may vary. Using the lunar calendar – it’s on February 1st this year. However, in her practice, she actually uses a solar calendar, which is known as the Saura calendar and using that she uses 4 February in her practice. But the solar calendar only vacillates by few hours cause it's a solar calendar. So it's very specific and very accurate.

Whereas, Western astrology gives about 500 different charts and Chinese astrology has something like over 13 million variations. So it means that somebody is quite unique and it is quite complex.

If you are intrigued to learn more about the meanings and influences the Year of the Water Tiger has, then tune in to this episode here

Jillian has been a guest before on my podcast, where she talked about Feng Shui.

#88 - How Feng Shui Can Create Harmony & Balance in Our Lives,

You can listen to that episode here

If you are struggling and feel you would like some help, support and guidance, do get in touch. As a fully qualified counsellor with more than 17 years experience, I have worked with what must run into hundreds of individuals and couples over the years. No problem is too small or too large. If it's having a negative impact on your life, I'm here to offer help.

If you would like a chat, then click on this link to arrange a Free call to see whether I'm the best person to help you -

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