Imagine yourself coming back from a shopping spree with your loved one. you start to unload the car and you keep loading the bags onto each of your hands. Your hands are full and neither of you can carry any more.
The bags weigh a ton, and the handles are cutting into your fingers.
Your partner asks you to take some of his bags because he wants to find the house keys.
But you can’t carry any more - you are completely overloaded!
There are choices, he can carry on struggling and juggling the bags he is holding or he can put some of his bags down, or you can put your bags down to relieve him of his.
The reason I am telling this story is that when we are loaded down with our own emotional bags – or baggage, we don’t have the capacity to take on anyone else’s.
To take on anyone else’s baggage we have to put down or put aside some of ours. But in reality, we don’t have the capacity to do this.
Each of us needs to take responsibility for our own issues, and unless and until we have dealt with them and are in a healthy place, we don’t have the capacity to take on anyone else’s.
That’s why we need to take care of ourselves first. It’s not selfish, it's sensible.
If you are struggling with overload, get in touch for a chat - firstname.lastname@example.org