I hear a great number of gurus and coaches advocating positive mindset as the panacea and the way to ‘move your life forward’.
They suggest that if you're struggling with feelings of self-doubt, lack of confidence and lack of belief in yourself positive affirmations will change your mindset and help you move forward.
For those who have unshakable self-esteem to start with, and are just going through a blip that can work. However, research shows that most positive affirmations operate at the surface level of conscious thinking. Whereas the old negative repetitive thoughts and behaviours are buried deep in our unconscious, often going way back often into childhood. Memories of times when things went wrong will overwrite the positive affirmations because the subconscious stores all those negative and limiting beliefs.
They will cause a battle in your head, and many times the negative thoughts will win. Because we are programmed to keep ourselves safe.
It’s much safer to stay in your comfort zone, believing you aren’t strong or successful. It’s easier to believe that you shouldn’t try to challenge yourself, you convince yourself you will only fail. Memories flood into your mind of the times you have in the past. The exams you failed, the jobs you didn’t get, the failed relationships.
Whilst I don't suggest that you dwell on your negative thoughts or emotions, just papering over them with positive affirmations, is only a temporary fix.
By exploring the root of those negative thoughts and behaviours that keep you stuck in never ending destructive patterns, then challenging them, will enable you to let go of them. From there you can build your confidence and self believe on strong long lasting foundations.
If you would like to explore this at a deeper level then get in touch - info@wendycapewell.co.uk
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